What is Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy? A Beginner’s Guide
- Brittney Green
- Mar 14
- 4 min read
Updated: Mar 15
Introduction
Have you ever felt like there was a battle going on inside of you? Like one part of you wants to move one way but another part wants to go the other? Maybe one part of you wants to exercise but the other wants to lay on the couch. Or maybe one part of you wants to go to therapy but another part feels scared.
We naturally talk about our experiences by describing multiple feelings and thoughts inside of us as “parts,” and this can be a powerful way to explore and understand ourselves on a deeper level. Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a therapeutic approach built on this idea. This evidence-based therapy has helped countless people heal from the inside out.
What is IFS?
So how does it work? We just name conflicting thoughts and feelings as “parts” and call it a day? Well, sort of! That’s a great first step.
In IFS we begin by identifying these different thoughts and emotions as “parts.” From there, we explore them more deeply. By learning about a part’s intentions, hopes, and fears, we gain a new level of understanding that can open the door to healing and change.
A key principle of IFS is relating to our parts from a place of Self. But this Self isn’t just our everyday identity; in IFS, Self is an innate part of us that is inherently wise, compassionate, and calm. It is the ideal leader for our internal system. Many people worry they don’t have access to their Self, but in IFS therapy, the therapist can “lend” their Self energy to help clients connect with their own.
Understanding Your Inner Parts
While each of us has unique parts, they generally fall into three categories:
Protectors: These parts work to keep us safe and prevent pain. A common belief among protectors is “What I’m doing is better than the alternative.”
Managers: Proactive protectors who try to prevent emotional pain, often by maintaining control, enforcing rules, and planning ahead.
Firefighters: Reactive protectors that step in when pain arises, often using quick fixes like distraction, numbing, or avoidance.
Exiles: These parts carry the pain of the past trauma and are often pushed out of awareness by protectors to protect us from distress.
How IFS Helps with Healing
IFS provides a framework for deep healing by creating understanding and safety. As an IFS therapist, I aim to build an authentic relationship with all of my client’s parts. I want to understand what a part does, what they hope to achieve, why this strategy became necessary, and most of all, I want to know if they would prefer to do something else (and if so, how to make that happen).
True healing happens when we work with exiles, not just protectors.
For example, let’s consider a client who struggles with overworking and self-criticism. Their managers may push them to work long hours to prevent failure, while their firefighters respond to mistakes with intense self-criticism. This creates a cycle of stress, anxiety, and exhaustion. Through IFS, we uncover the exile they are trying to protect—perhaps a deep-seated fear of worthlessness, rooted in a painful childhood memory. By addressing and healing the exile, the system can shift, and those once-overworking managers and critical firefighters can take on healthier roles.
Who Can Benefit from IFS Therapy?
IFS is a versatile therapy that has been found helpful for many issues, including:
Trauma, PTSD, and C-PTSD
Anxiety and Depression
Shame and self criticism
Relationship and attachment struggles
Perfectionism and people-pleasing
IFS was originally developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz while working with clients struggling with eating disorders, but research has shown its effectiveness across a wide range of challenges.
What to Expect in an IFS Therapy Session
In an IFS session, you should expect to be greeted by a therapist who offers you warmth, empathy, and compassion. Your therapist will help you explore your parts with curiosity rather than judgment.
Because IFS integrates with trauma-informed care, it is also a non-pathologizing approach. Rather than fixating on diagnoses, IFS helps us understand that every part of us exists for a reason, often as a survival strategy. My belief as an IFS therapist is “If only we knew more, everything would make sense.”
Our work often begins with getting to know your managers, who run the show most of the time. In time, we work with the firefighters that show up when you feel pain. And when ready, we work with exiles to help them release their burdens and find safety.
How to Get Started with IFS Therapy
You can start exploring IFS today by noticing your own parts in daily life. Do you have a manager that always checks the traffic report before heading out? How about a firefighter that loves a hot bath with ice cream? Or even a manager who helps keep that ice cream stocked in your freezer?
Next time you feel overwhelmed, pause and ask yourself: “What part of me is coming up right now?”
If IFS resonates with you and you’re curious to get started: let’s connect!